On Birthdays and Priorities
My birthday is on Saturday. I've always loved my birthday, especially the date - 10/10 is such a great date! If only I had been born one year later; then I could have turned 30 on 10/10/10! That would have been amazing. But still, 10/10 of any year is a great date on which to be born - it's in my favorite season, you write it the same way whether you're writing an American-style date or a European-style date, and I share it with a surprisingly large number of friends and acquaintances (seven at last count!). I am not one of those people who hate to have the waiters sing to them in restaurants and I am all about getting free stuff on my big day (actually, most freebies are usually good for the whole month, but it depends on the offer). So far, I've had two free birthday burgers, one from Red Robin and one from Ruby Tuesday's, and I have yet to redeem my free entree from Moe's, my free sub at Firehouse, my free dessert at Olive Garden, my free dessert at Hot Cakes, my free shake at Arby's (which Kevin will have to drink because I can't have milk), and my 25% off coupon at Payless. Birthdays are great!
My mom's birthday is the day after mine and she always says I was her best birthday present ever. :) We almost always do a joint family birthday party, so I was not surprised to get a call recently, wondering when I would like to celebrate with the family and what I would like to do. There seemed to be a bit more urgency to the planning this year. After all, how many birthdays do I have left? I know no one ever knows how many birthdays they have left, but it seems my number is a little more finite now and commemorating each one a little more important.
Diagnosis with a terminal illness forces you to really think about your life, its big events as well as the ordinary daily ones, and the decisions you make. Of course, as the saying goes, "No one gets to the end of his life and wishes he had worked more," but how DO you prioritize things when you don't know if you have 10 months or 10 years? If I have 10 years, then continuing to excel in my work and further my influence seems more important than if I only have 10 months. If I only have 10 months, then I should bid my work a fond farewell, cash out my retirement, drink that Arby's milkshake, and start working on my bucket list!
These are the things I wrestle with now and how it feels to have your first birthday post-MBC (metastatic breast cancer) diagnosis. I remind myself that it's all in God's hands and always has been: "You saw my body as it was formed. All the days planned for me were written in your book before I was one day old" (Ps. 139:16). None of that has changed except that God may have allowed me to have a little more knowledge about how many days I have left. I think this is a topic I need to sit with a little longer, to ponder more deeply, to seek understanding as to why God would have given me this foresight. Stay tuned...
My mom's birthday is the day after mine and she always says I was her best birthday present ever. :) We almost always do a joint family birthday party, so I was not surprised to get a call recently, wondering when I would like to celebrate with the family and what I would like to do. There seemed to be a bit more urgency to the planning this year. After all, how many birthdays do I have left? I know no one ever knows how many birthdays they have left, but it seems my number is a little more finite now and commemorating each one a little more important.
Diagnosis with a terminal illness forces you to really think about your life, its big events as well as the ordinary daily ones, and the decisions you make. Of course, as the saying goes, "No one gets to the end of his life and wishes he had worked more," but how DO you prioritize things when you don't know if you have 10 months or 10 years? If I have 10 years, then continuing to excel in my work and further my influence seems more important than if I only have 10 months. If I only have 10 months, then I should bid my work a fond farewell, cash out my retirement, drink that Arby's milkshake, and start working on my bucket list!
These are the things I wrestle with now and how it feels to have your first birthday post-MBC (metastatic breast cancer) diagnosis. I remind myself that it's all in God's hands and always has been: "You saw my body as it was formed. All the days planned for me were written in your book before I was one day old" (Ps. 139:16). None of that has changed except that God may have allowed me to have a little more knowledge about how many days I have left. I think this is a topic I need to sit with a little longer, to ponder more deeply, to seek understanding as to why God would have given me this foresight. Stay tuned...
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