Pain and Polish

Tomorrow is another scan day. I'm a bit eager for this one because I've been dealing with a lot of pain lately. First, it was headaches, a new kind I haven't had before. Ones that last for days and often don't respond to my usual pain medications. Now it's pain in my upper and lower back; pain that has me hobbling around the house and unable to lift even our nine-pound foster pup. 

Is it cancer? I don't know. Maybe I just need a chiropractor or a physical therapist. But my first thought will always be cancer. I'll know for sure later this week. They did already rule out cancer's spread to my skull or brain as the cause of my headaches, which is an enormous relief. It's just no fun to be in pain. 

Obviously, pain clouds one's vision and makes everything look dismal. I can't do the exercise classes I was enjoying so much earlier in the pandemic and I miss the walks my husband and I were taking several times a week. My attention span for deep thoughts, books, and writing is diminished, which is probably why I haven't posted much lately. It doesn't help that there is so much turmoil in our country and that we seem fractured in opinions on just about everything.

So I've been dancing along on the surface of life for several months. Distracting myself with predictable TV shows, light works of fiction, fair trade shopping, and nail polish. Lots and lots of nail polish. I even decided to start selling nail polish! And managing this business has kept me going over the fall and winter. I've carved out my own happy place online where we post manicure ideas and play games and participate in general silliness. I'm not on the outside looking in, either, as I have been with so many things this past year (stupid compromised immune system). I'm running the show! And there's no cancer or politics or pandemic. Just finding joy on the tips of my fingers.

Life is hard. Sometimes it's good to stop focusing on that and redirect your gaze. I hope I get some path forward toward pain relief this week, but if not, God is still good. And my fingernails have never looked cuter. 

What is this nail polish of which I speak? It's the most amazing creation! It's DRY and you put it on like a sticker! Which means no waiting for your nails to dry. No smudging. And they last twice as long as any liquid polish I've ever used. If you're interested, you can find out more by clicking on Heroic Nails at the top left of this page (just above my picture).