And so it goes

This is the life of someone with metastatic breast cancer - you live from scan to scan, from one tumor marker measurement to the next. On Monday, I will have my second set of scans since I began the Ibrance/Femara combo in July. The last scan I had only scanned my bones, but this time I'll be getting my bones and organs/tissues scanned for any new spots of cancer. If they find new spots, that means I've worn out my welcome with Ibrance and will need to switch to a new drug. If all is stable, I'll maintain the status quo.

To be honest, I'm a little nervous about the results of these scans. I feel more pressure in my chest and I worry if my lungs are affected. I have abdominal pain and wonder if it's spread there, too. I don't know if I have legitimate cause for concern or if my imagination is running away with me. Either way, I'll be glad to hear my results.

I am part of several support groups on Facebook - one for women with metastatic breast cancer, one for women of faith with metastatic breast cancer, and one for those of us on Ibrance. There are several of us who are in all three groups, so I see them post often. They've kept their profile photos the same, so they're easy to recognize as I scroll through.

Tonight I realized that one of the ones I've considered a staple of the group is down to her last few days. Her post caught my eye because she mentioned getting her last haircut. I didn't realize at first that she meant her last haircut ever. Did you ever think about getting your final haircut? Of looking death in the face as it's coming for you? I'm so thankful this woman is a believer and knows that heaven awaits her, but her impending journey has made mine seem a lot more real tonight.