Praying Like Jabez
Back in May, I wrote about how suffering in various ways can enlarge the numbers of people we can relate to and empathize with, who we can comfort with the comfort we've been given in and from Christ (2 Cor. 1:3-7). Many years ago, a popular Christian book brought the name of Jabez from Biblical obscurity to eminence in Christian circles. I think some of the teaching bordered on prosperity theology, but I heard one sermon on Jabez that crystallized my thinking about his request for God to "bless me indeed, and enlarge my territory, that Your hand would be with me, and that You would keep me from evil, that I may not cause pain!" (1 Chron. 4:10).
This sermon focused on the "enlarge my territory" part of the verse and talked about our sphere of influence. I long for my life to make a difference and I began asking God to "enlarge my territory," to touch more people through me, to use me to make His name great. Like I said in that May post, I didn't exactly know that that prayer would bring suffering, but so be it. Two other things happened fairly recently that I can now tie back to this prayer for enlarged territory.
The first was that Kevin didn't like my church. I absolutely adored my church and had been so excited to share it with him when we first met (he lived far away at the time). But he didn't like it, felt it was too similar to churches he had been to in his youth where liturgies had been empty rituals and Jesus was hard to find. I was devastated. I honestly considered that perhaps this relationship wasn't meant to be. But we got married anyway and God softened my heart toward trying to find a place to worship where we both felt comfortable and close to God. I didn't realize it at the time, but God was enlarging my territory.
My old church was so wonderful in caring for me through my first cancer diagnosis and people there are still caring for me as though I never left. But I now have a whole second church family who's loving on me, praying for me, bringing me meals, cleaning my house, offering me rides, and seeing me live out my faith in the midst of suffering. God used something very painful for me (leaving my church) to answer my prayer for a greater sphere of influence. He also didn't let me stay a person who slips in and out of the large church service without getting to know anyone. He put me on the prayer list! He gave me Facebook, that puts a face with a name, so I can't go sneaking around in obscurity. He gave me a blog, so people could see my heart when my lips are quiet. His ways are always higher.
The second way God has enlarged my territory is through a new job. I loved my old job and my coworkers were amazing. I could not have imagined better care and cheer than what they gave me through my first tangle with this disease. And they are still quietly caring for me, getting the word out that I need extra time off work for treatments and donating their vacation hours for me to use, bringing me meals, buying me lunch. But a few months ago, I felt it was time for a change in my career, to challenge myself in something related but new. After almost seven years in my old job, I joined a new team and now have a whole second work family. I started this new job only weeks before my stage 4 diagnosis. And yet they, too, are caring for me - donating vacation hours, even running the women's four miler in my honor. They, too, are watching me attempt to honor God through circumstances that seem unfair and just plain wrong in the world's eyes.
God answers prayer. It is almost always not in the way you anticipated. But He pulls together threads you thought were disparate, even ugly, and weaves them into something beautiful. He has allowed me to suffer so that I would have a platform from which people could hear me and common circumstances so they could relate to me. I was an English major for a reason and it wasn't because I was going to use it in my career - God knew He was going to use my writing to encourage people in their faith. I've changed churches and jobs so that increased numbers of people might come to know me and care about me as I go through these various trials, so that they might see the faith that upholds me.
Thank you, God. Continue to "bless me indeed, and enlarge my territory, that Your hand would be with me, and that You would keep me from evil, that I may not cause pain!"
This sermon focused on the "enlarge my territory" part of the verse and talked about our sphere of influence. I long for my life to make a difference and I began asking God to "enlarge my territory," to touch more people through me, to use me to make His name great. Like I said in that May post, I didn't exactly know that that prayer would bring suffering, but so be it. Two other things happened fairly recently that I can now tie back to this prayer for enlarged territory.
The first was that Kevin didn't like my church. I absolutely adored my church and had been so excited to share it with him when we first met (he lived far away at the time). But he didn't like it, felt it was too similar to churches he had been to in his youth where liturgies had been empty rituals and Jesus was hard to find. I was devastated. I honestly considered that perhaps this relationship wasn't meant to be. But we got married anyway and God softened my heart toward trying to find a place to worship where we both felt comfortable and close to God. I didn't realize it at the time, but God was enlarging my territory.
My old church was so wonderful in caring for me through my first cancer diagnosis and people there are still caring for me as though I never left. But I now have a whole second church family who's loving on me, praying for me, bringing me meals, cleaning my house, offering me rides, and seeing me live out my faith in the midst of suffering. God used something very painful for me (leaving my church) to answer my prayer for a greater sphere of influence. He also didn't let me stay a person who slips in and out of the large church service without getting to know anyone. He put me on the prayer list! He gave me Facebook, that puts a face with a name, so I can't go sneaking around in obscurity. He gave me a blog, so people could see my heart when my lips are quiet. His ways are always higher.
The second way God has enlarged my territory is through a new job. I loved my old job and my coworkers were amazing. I could not have imagined better care and cheer than what they gave me through my first tangle with this disease. And they are still quietly caring for me, getting the word out that I need extra time off work for treatments and donating their vacation hours for me to use, bringing me meals, buying me lunch. But a few months ago, I felt it was time for a change in my career, to challenge myself in something related but new. After almost seven years in my old job, I joined a new team and now have a whole second work family. I started this new job only weeks before my stage 4 diagnosis. And yet they, too, are caring for me - donating vacation hours, even running the women's four miler in my honor. They, too, are watching me attempt to honor God through circumstances that seem unfair and just plain wrong in the world's eyes.
God answers prayer. It is almost always not in the way you anticipated. But He pulls together threads you thought were disparate, even ugly, and weaves them into something beautiful. He has allowed me to suffer so that I would have a platform from which people could hear me and common circumstances so they could relate to me. I was an English major for a reason and it wasn't because I was going to use it in my career - God knew He was going to use my writing to encourage people in their faith. I've changed churches and jobs so that increased numbers of people might come to know me and care about me as I go through these various trials, so that they might see the faith that upholds me.
Thank you, God. Continue to "bless me indeed, and enlarge my territory, that Your hand would be with me, and that You would keep me from evil, that I may not cause pain!"
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